Guess What

It happened again. I was talking to my mother and standing wheny legs decided to give out again. I think I’m getting better. Instead of crying like I usually end up doing, I just cursed my frustration. I’ll probably cry later when I’m not in the presence of my mother. 

My legs are freezing. It’s beginning to become more and more annoying.

Let’s see how long this one lasts…. Sigh…


So, let’s talk about yesterday. 

I went to this supposed neurologist. I get there, and he checks my reflexes and has me walk a short distance and then tells me “tests” are normal. Also, tells me that “there is nothing that can only last hours and stop.” 

Haha, no, bub. There is, I’ve read about numerous things. Amongst these “tests” he put a vibration tool on my legs and on my way out, my legs start getting sore. Like electricity was zapping through my veins. It continues to get worse until I was in tears and swallowing screams. My concerned boyfriend then pointed out that my legs were exceptionally pale, but my toes were bright red. Almost as if all my blood rushed to the tips of my toes and stayed there. 

Since then, the pain has died down a bit, but it continues to get more painful to walk. Every step I take feels like my bones are breaking crack by crack. 

I looked up this “nuerologist” on Health Grades. He had a rating of 2 stars, and according to many reviews, he refuses to touch men. Which is why I am very glad my boyfriend came back with me. 

He was rude, impatient, and didn’t like questions.

I have my nerve conduction and an MRI on my spine tomorrow morning, but something tells me that I’ll be ending up finding somewhere else again. 
If anyone has any idea what specifically could cause my issue, thoughts would be highly appreciated.
Temporary paralysis, numbness, inability to move or feel my legs mid-thigh down. No senses. No movement. Legs pale and ice cold.

When I am able to move again, a tingling feeling happens in my legs and after about 10 minutes I can move them slowly, but weakly again. Longest episode being 9 hours as of date.

Now with pain when I walk and increasing.

In Other News

3 days (well, nights) ago I had another “episode” as my mother calls it. Luckily, it was late at night and I was already in bed. 

It lasted from about 11:40pm to 6:17am. So about 7 hours that time. I know this because I was having a hard time sleeping, and kept waking up almost every hour. At least it was a little less than the 9 hour mess I had gone through at the hospital.

I wasn’t going to say anything about it before, but my boyfriend asked me if I had any other instances, and I told him. 

We’ve both have a lot of stress on our plates. And let me tell you; stress tastes horrible! 

I made the diagnosis with the at-home blood pressure cuff I have, that he has high blood pressure and it seems to be the main cause of his migraines. 

But onward with my appointment! 

Until then!!!

Possibilities of Stress

So, everything seems to be healing okay from what I can tell. However, I have a hard lump that’s all bruised and jutting out beyond my skin, coincidently the thing I was supposed to be rid of via this surgery.

My mother thinks it might be a hematoma, which she had a few of from her surgeries. 

Of course, I say “hematoma” to my boyfriend and he immediately starts staring at my head in a worries fashion. Stupid soap operas.

So I have my follow-up appointment soon, bit may have to postpone it because I just don’t have the money to go all that way right now. 

I already have to worry about the possibility of going to Buffalo because my boyfriend’s grandfather passed. So far it has been a very eventful month. 

I’ll try to keep you updated.

Until then!

Nurses Who Know

Do you know what I love? Nurses who know claustrophobic people don’t like things pressing against their faces! When I had my surgery, the nurses had the mask resting against my chin and tilted up and told me to breathe in deeply. It was a much better experience than when I had my appendix taken out at a hospital nearest to me. 

With my appendix out, they had shoved the mask on my face and told me to breathe in. Then upon waking, I went into a panic attack and then they shoved the mask more and more into my face and told me to calm down. Yeah, that’s easy with you choking me with a rubber mask!!!

This time, it was much better. I’m pretty sure they slipped me some happy gas in there, too, because I didn’t have a panic attack this time. 

I loved my nurses! (well, all but two of them, but we’ll get there.) They were friendly and polite and tried their best to distract me from unpleasant things like needles. 

As for the two I don’t like, my first nurse was a cranky old hag who told me to put my robe on backwards for her own amusement for another one I didn’t like (a condescending blonde that didn’t knock when she popped in while I was trying to dress.) 

So, I told my boyfriend that if they tell me to turn it around again, they were doing it. 

It’s kind of funny, though. I concentrated more on making my boyfriend smile and laugh before my surgery before anything else. 

He has been very sweet and concerned about me, even doing some things without my asking. Apparently I slept for a good 6 hours after I got home, and when I got up to use the restroom, he spread out the sheets to smooth them and even tried to tuck me in as gently as he could. 

That deserved a big kiss. When a guy says that if you want anything, he’ll drop his video games and do it, you know it’s serious. 🤣

I’m still in pain, but only as much as I was before, until the nerves around my nipple wake up, then it feels like sharp shockwaves trying to explode my nipple. 

On the bright side, I still have to wear my bra, (I can’t stand not wearing my bra, only some will understand) and now I can eat almost everything I want. My nurse told me no coffee for 48 hours, though, but I can have soda, which confuses me. 

However, I cannot sleep on my right side (the side I had surgery on) or, obviously, my stomach. So I have to prop up on a few pillows, which I hate doing because it always makes my neck stiff. 

Otherwise, all seems to be okay. I’ll keep you updated on my experience!

Until then!

High Emotions

Today has been high emotions, between worrying about my health and upcoming surgery, waiting to have another “episode” where I just fall and can’t move, and then worrying how my boyfriend will react to latest news. 

No, not that. Still a virgin over here. Plus, if PMS and bleeding is a part of it, I think things need to be checked on.

He had wrecked his car falling asleep at the wheel about a week ago. His first car that he worked for a few years to pay for every cent to buy. It really doesn’t look that bad, at a glance. But the machanic said it would be cheaper to just total it and get a new car. Apparently it’s worse than we originally thought. 
I feel exhausted and weak, but my emotions (and other’s) are making me restless. I’m hoping that things will calm down before my surgery, because this is unnerving right now.